my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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