And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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