This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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