Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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