I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
