SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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