wakey wakey hands off snakey
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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