I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
