In the future we'll all be gay
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
