Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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