i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Say something about gay babies.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
