his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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