FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
