Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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