i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
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