Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
