They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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