hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
