Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
