He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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