i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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