saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
