im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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