just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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