i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize