May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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