let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
