Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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