i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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