people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
