dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
