K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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