um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
