It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
