she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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