Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
and you fell through a lawn chair
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up