That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
