Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
