who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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