i permit you to call me
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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