Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Randomize
