How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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