I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
