It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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