how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
