ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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