Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
