I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
someone owes me an orgasm
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Randomize