You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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