he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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