I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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